Bones Theory

Morning After Q: Who is More Vulnerable Right Now? Booth or Brennan?

33 Comments

Last night’s ep was pretty great, though it didn’t raise too many questions except…could B&B be any more awesome? Haha, but since we’ve spent many other hours discussing that very thing and will probably discuss it even more, here’s something else we should analyze: Who is more vulnerable right now: Booth or Brennan?

I assume that the immediate gut reaction to this will be … are you kidding me, of course, it’s Brennan! But, after The Bones That Weren’t, I’m thinking that Booth might be just as vulnerable. Let me explain myself, and then you can let me know, of the two partners, who you think is more vulnerable.

I think so far this season we’ve seen a really vulnerable Brennan, right? One who is learning how to deal with the consequences of her decision in the 100th. I think she desperately wants to make Booth happy and now has to watch someone else try and make him happy instead… that alone has to make her very vulnerable. So, those that immediately answer Brennan, I can totally understand.

But –and I hope I can explain myself with some measure of coherency here— I think Booth might be just as, if not more, vulnerable right now. And I think the reason is this: he’s trying to move on, he’s trying to be happy, but he knows, he knows that it’s never going to be exactly right. He’s settling and he knows it and I think it’s gotta be so painful to know that real, ecstatic, wanna-smile-all- the-time happiness is going to be forever out of his reach. Of course, you and I know that it’s not really out of reach, that Brennan feels the same way, but he doesn’t know that.

Watching The Bones that Weren’t, you know when I thought Booth was the most genuinely happy that I’ve seen him all season?…when he was asking Brennan to guess about which woman was the murderer (C’mon, guess, guess, guess!). And everything else—the candlelight dinner, the I’ll miss you—all seemed like a desperate attempt to reassure himself that he IS happy. When he said, how did I get so lucky, I swear it actually broke my heart a little because I could practically see him thinking, I am lucky, I am lucky, I am lucky, like a tiny little mantra. He’s trying very, very hard and I, for one, think that makes him quite vulnerable. Because think about this, if he can’t convince himself that he’s happy, if he admits— even to himself— that he can’t really be happy without Brennan, then he’s resigning himself to being unhappy forever, right? As far as he knows, Brennan doesn’t want anything more than to be his partner and friend and he’s trying to accept it and he’s trying to find some measure of contentment. But you tell me, if he knows deep down that it’s all a façade, then how vulnerable does that leave him?

What do we think? Am I reaching? Am I seeing something that isn’t there? Is Brennan really the only vulnerable one left in this partnership? Or is it possible that Booth, who himself has admitted it, knows that settling for second best doesn’t cut it?

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33 thoughts on “Morning After Q: Who is More Vulnerable Right Now? Booth or Brennan?

  1. GREAT question! I think you are absolutely right. They are *both* pretty vulnerable right now. I almost feel like whenever Booth is with (or talking about) Hannah he is trying really hard to prove to himself and to everyone else that he’s perfectly happy. Like, you said, he’s trying to convince himself. He really wants to make it work with Hannah right now, I just think it might be harder for him than he’s letting on (and maybe *he* doesn’t even realize that). I’m not saying that he doesn’t love her, I’m just…making an observation.

    Also, I am so glad you mentioned how genuinely happy Booth was when he was teasing Brennan (C’mon, guess, guess, guess!). That tiny little bit was my favorite part of that episode and I didn’t really know why until you mentioned that.

    Thanks for the great post! 🙂

  2. Thanks for another great post! I do believe that Booth is more vulnerable. Brennan is trying to make him happy because of the same; but as you said, Booth is in the position of trying to move on from something and someone he doesn’t really want to move on from. By trying to convince himself he’s trying to convince the rest of the people that surround him that he’s happy. But if he were really happy wouldn’t Brennan had, in a logical way, stopped warning Hannah and giving her advices to make Booth happy? She KNOWS deep inside of her heart that he isn’t, therefore making him mire vulnerable. Because as much as he can pretend he’s in a very difficult place!

  3. To me both of them are vunerable right now in their own way.Like you said Booth is trying desperaly move on but in my view thus far he has failed. He’s fail cuz he’s trying prove to himself all the time that he moved on and this is a sign that he won’t and never will. Not w/out Brennan. i can see Brennan vunerable too in her particular and unique way. She’s trying be more open emotionally and trying accept in her view she won’t have Booth and this is couls be pretty hard even if she doesn’t show pretty tough to go through. In my understanding both of them are making their cut on the path rough path of the vulnerability.

  4. I definitely see them as both being very vulnerable, and at this point I wouldn’t be able to gauge who is more so. They are both vulnerable in different ways.

    Brennan is vulnerable because she’s sacrificed her own happiness to ensure Booth’s would-be happiness, yet she’s slowly realizing that in doing so she’s living the life that she planned, but ultimately not one she will enjoy. However, in realizing her mistake in turning him down, she’s left with either leaving it alone and letting him go (ensuring additional misery unknowingly on both their parts), or running the risk of putting herself (and her heart) out there and telling him she loves him, potentially exposing her to rejection from the only man that can complete her.

    Booth is vulnerable because he’s entered into this new relationship with Hannah banking on the idea that she will eventually be able to replace Brennan in his heart. We all assume that despite his overtures about Hannah, deep down he still loves Brennan. He’s trying REALLY hard to make it work with her, thinking that by ensuring Hannah’s happiness he will ensure his. This makes him appear somewhat needy, and so if things were to go south with her, his failure to succeed in the relationship would seriously affect him I think. As this story goes on, depending on how long Hannah will be around, I’m sure we’ll be seeing cracks in the relationship, and we’ll be seeing Booth coming back to Brennan as his constant, his confidant, leaving him even more vulnerable because he won’t be able to help being caught under her spell. At some point, there may be not one but two women who could break him.

    Great food for thought bbmagic!

  5. I think I’ve seen his vulnerabilty clearly two times this season: the first is the end of Maggots in the Meathead when he comes home and all the girls are hanging out; he looked completely lost, like he had been kicked out of his domain. But when he follows Brennan to the door, I don’t believe he’s ever looked so conflicted, as if seeing that what he really wants is sooooo close yet out of reach.
    The second time is when Hannah and Brennan are together after Hannah gets shot; he looks back at the two of them together, doubt and indecision written all over his face.

    Brennan is hurting, but I don’t see her as vulnerable right now. She’s such a strong person and seems to be taking comfort in the thought that she walked away in order to further Booth’s happiness. There are moments of sadness and maybe regret for her, but not the “at sea” quality that we saw just before she left on her dig. Booth though has really lost his footing since he came back; and it seems to get worse the longer he is back with Brennan. Eventually he’s bound to slip-no one can live with that degree of conflict and not mess up.

  6. So far this season Brennan is still relatively clueless as to what her feelings for Booth really are, and until she does make some headway in this department, she really isn’t as vulnerable as Booth. She has him back as her partner, and she is resigned to the fact that he’s happy with Hannah now. In her mind, she still believes she can’t be that romantic partner he needs. She’s had no breakthrough moment that has changed her outlook. She has regrets that she can’t be the woman she thinks Booth wants and needs, so she remains supportive of him in order to convince herself she’s done the right thing by letting him move on. She understands that her issues should not affect his happiness. We see this as self-sacrificing, but I’m not sure Brennan does right now, because she doesn’t use psychology to explain her emotions and thoughts. She said she dreamed about a relationship with Booth, but realized it wouldn’t work. That means she hasn’t changed. Is she vulnerable? Not so much. Until she figures out that what she feels for Booth is actual love, then I’m not on the “she’s vulnerable” bandwagon. When we do get to see her crack, it will be awesome.

    Now, Booth is a different story. What makes him vulnerable is the fact that he KNOWS he loves Brennan, but can’t have her. Booth is also aware that Brennan cares for him, but he still thinks it’s just a “because we’re partners/friends” thing. She has not given him any indication that she thinks differently. Booth’s vulnerability stems from the fact that his relationship with Hannah is built on the wrong reasons – with the wrong woman – and when the relationship goes south, he’ll only feel like he’s failed again. Booth will be emotionally shocked and confused, likely closing himself off to any overtures from Brennan…when she does open up to him. He can’t win. I still see a long road ahead with some pretty rocky times…a lot of soul searching on both sides.

  7. Yes, I think Booth is vulnerable too…and I can definitely see where you’re coming from. After last night’s ep…I’d also say he is very vulnerable when it comes to his age. I wish I could give Booth a hug and tell him not to worry – he only gets sexier with age 😉

  8. Wonderful …..I am glad that you noticed it too. His relationship with Hannah is just not quite right. I think he is trying to convince himself that he is happy and can move on. I totally think he is vulnerable. As much as Brennan but in a different way.

  9. OK, i made the mistake of glancing at this when at work. I then went on to spend all afternoon formulating a fabulous reply, even if i do say so myself. Unfortunately….i can no longer remember it!
    So i am going to try and answer it now…but i know it won’t be the answer i wanted to give 😦

    I honestly think this is a question with no real answer. You could agrue both ways until you’re blue in the face, but the fact is neither one is more vulnerable than the other. It’s no competition and i think both of them are hurting.

    Booth is in pain/vulnerable for all the reasons you said. He has what appears to be the perfect woman for him. She suits him…adores him….and he is convincing himself he loves her. Maybe he even does? Only Booth knows (well…HH if we get technical! LOL) but either way he knows this isn’t what he wants. It should be….the life he’s living at the moment should be ‘it’ for him. Enough. But living with the knowledge that what he has pales in comparison to what he could of had? That has to hurt…

    OK….i’m going to ‘Friends’ you a second, because this is what’s going round my head! LOL.

    I imagine most people watched it, but if not short recap so you know where i’m coming from. Rachel leaves her fiance, Barry, at the alter because she wants more from life than being married to a man she is ‘comfortable’ with. In one episode her mother drops by, announcing she’s thinking of leaving her husband. Her mother comes to Rachel because she thinks she’ll be supportive, and that Rachel will know what she’s feeling like. They then have the following exchange

    MRS GREEN: I guess I just figured of all people you would understand this.

    RACHEL: Why on earth would I understand this?

    MRS GREEN: You didn’t marry your Barry. I did.

    So in my head i now have Hannah as Booth’s ‘Barry’. Now i know the two situations are completely different but stay with me. Hannah is his ‘safe’ choice. He can be happy with her. He won’t get his heart crushed…again. In Booth’s mind, they can have this life together that is easy. No arguments, no confrontation, no real conflict. On paper they are pefect together and they can be happy with one another…i think we’ll all agree that much is clear. Booth and Hannah can live happily ever after. But will they want to? Part of what i personally feel Booth’s attraction to Brennan is that she pushes him. He can’t coast along in ‘neutral’ as it were…she makes him go that extra mile. She makes him a better man…even if he resents her for it at the time. Hannah doesn’t do that. So far we haven’t seen any sign that she will. It may happen…but i doubt it.

    Wow and i totally went off point! What was i saying? Oh yes….Brennan.

    Like i said at the beginning, Brennan and Booth are both incredibly vulnerable right now. Booth for the reasons you, i and others have said. Brennan for very different ones.

    Brennan is living the ‘life she expected’ like she has already said (broke my heart when she said it…but that’s a whole other thing!). But i believe it is no longer the life she wants…and i think she is becoming aware of that fact.

    And imagine that. You work your whole life with this goal…this expectation of what your life will be and what will make you happy, only to find that when you reach it….well, it’s changed without you noticing. What you always thought would fulfill you and satisfy you no longer does…you want more. At this point i’m not completely certain Brennan knows exactly what that ‘more’ is, but it think she’s aware it’s there. And my heart hurts for her. She has such a long journey to take before she finds what she’s been missing….and i know both she and i are going to be hurt along the way. And i can’t wait.

    Right, you get some kind of gold star if you read all that (though i doubt many did! LOL).

    I’m pretty sure it doesn’t make much sense and i was going to delete it…but it did take me about 45mins to get it out and i need something to show for that time! 😀

    • ha, I totally read that! And I can probably quote you almost every Friends episode by heart, so … ’nuff said! Love the Barry reference and I totally agree. I don’t disagree that Booth could be content with Hannah, I don’t think he could be truly happy! Part of that also is, because I think, he’s not himself with her the way he is with Brennan. This was what became particularly evident to me in The Bones that Weren’t: Booth is trying to be perfect in his relationship with Hannah, with Brennan he can just be. I think that’s a rare and quite intoxicating feeling, when you can JUST BE with someone and that person for Booth is simply Brennan! 🙂

      p.s. Let me say, those were 45 minutes well spend! Very insightful 🙂

  10. Great post, I totally agree! They’re both making sacrifices for what they think the other wants. Pretty wonderful storytelling if you ask me. Both of them are punishing themselves in a sense to give the other what they want. It’s basically their entire partnership in a condensed, angsty nutshell. 😛

  11. My immediate answer= Booth. Seriously!! In last night’s episode, when Sweets came to ask him about how he should go about “forgetting Daisy”, Booth’s face/response said it all. “You’re a man, you move on”. His face was anything but “I’ve moved on” (please tell me I wasn’t the only one who saw a painful expression…am I imagining things?)

  12. Nope, I saw the painful expression too, along with the hopeless tone of his voice.

  13. I think it’s shifted around some. In the first two eps, I sort of think they were equally vulnerable, Booth because he was being hit over the head with the realization that seven months apart hadn’t changed his feelings for her – he’s still in love with her – and Brennan because she was being confronted with the change he warned her about on the bench in the finale. I don’t think she understood what he meant then (and really, neither did he, he just knew something had to change) but I think she was pretty much expecting to come back and have everything be the way it had always been. And then it wasn’t.

    But now? She’s settled into the new reality, and if she’s not quite as happy as she’d assumed she would be if he someday had a girlfriend, I think she’s content. She still has his friendship, which was what she’d told herself she wanted, and, bonus, the girlfriend likes Brennan and isn’t threatened by their partnership.

    Booth, on the other hand, is very much still vulnerable. He’s busy trying to convince himself and everyone else that the emperor is fully clothed (‘I love her! I’m happy! I’m lucky’) when he knows in his heart that the emperor is stark naked — he’s still in love with his partner. Yeah, big time vulnerable.

    I expect as the season goes on that will flip flop again and wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a point where they’re once more equally vulnerable. But right now, I think he, uh, ‘wins’.

  14. I am feeling at this point that Booth went to Afghanistan and was vulnerable and a bit lonely,too. I think when he saved Hannah’s life, she did the impulsive thing and seduced Booth into having sex with her, and that it’s all it took. He wasn’t lonely any more. Hannah filled that empty spot in his life. Now that He’s back, Booth feels awkward. He believes he loves Hannah , but he knows how he feels about Brennan. It’s going to be interesting to see how things progress. Week to week I can hardly wait to see what happens. I just hope Booth that she doesn’t appear on the show again , and they break up off screen!!

  15. I think both of them are very vurnerable right now, maybe more than we’ve ever seen them so far because they are this way almost every time we see them lately. Both for different reasons but still kinda the same because in the end it revolves around Hannah.
    Booth was already vulnerable when he left to Afghanistan, Hannah was there so he fell easily. But now he’s back in the real world, with his work, family and friends and it’s just not so easy anymore.
    Brennan went to Maluku to get some perspective but being back and having everything changed this drastically makes it difficult for her as well.
    They’re both trying and it’s hard for both of them. For response to this question would be Brennan for almost everyone but when you think about it there’s a lot on the line for Booth here. As you’ve said if he can’t make it work with Hannah, he’ll feel like he’ll never get a chance at happiness because Brennan doesn’t want him. Brennan really wants Booth to be happy but sometimes feels insecure and I think she has a little issues with her new place in his life. Like a few episodes ago with the phone, when both she and Hannah said “you’re welcome” at the same time, now that’s what I call awkward, awkward, very awkward!
    I’m curious to see how this will develop, whether they’ll gain more strength in the current situation or if it will all fall down miserably.

  16. I am totally in agreement with you here. Booth is incredibly fragile. If this relationship fails it will give Booth even more evidence that he is a failure. His desire to cook them a meal, his immediate denial that he’s not going to propose to Hannah, and that sad little ‘I’ll miss you’ all prove how hard he’s working. He has Hannah already worked out (given his people skills how could he not) and knows that she’s not the marrying kind, that she’s an adrenaline junkie, but that she gives her all in a relationship. His non opposition to her plans to expose the crooked cop shows his realisation that he can’t and shouldn’t attempt to control her actions, because he desperately doesn’t want to alienate her and thus speed her (inevitable) departure. I believe, though, that from deep down within the recesses of his heart he knows and is in denial about the fact that she will leave.

    I’m not sure I see that much vulnerability in Brennan, not yet anyway. I think I see regret, (her singular life doesn’t look quite so appealing anymore), loneliness (she hadn’t bargained on having to share Booth with another woman who has taken over his life and denied Brennan the connections they used to share as a matter of course (drinks and meals after work, late night visits, etc.), and maybe some confusion, because after obviously deciding to ‘open up’ more, the one person who would truly appreciate that is now otherwise engaged. But at the end of the day she did bring this whole sorry mess down on her own head and on Booth’s too.
    Once she starts to understand that fully then her vulnerabilities will truly kick in.
    Brilliant article, btw.

  17. I’m not exactly new to this site, but I never really posted anything because sometimes I feel as confused as Brennan as to what to think, especially after reading so many great responses with different viewpoints. But it’s nice knowing that I’m not alone in my love of this show. And it’s comforting to see that other people are just as disturbed by Booth’s increasing “snarkiness” (esp. towards Brennan) and jerk-ish behavior in general. I’m not going to debate who is more vulnerable here, just talk about what makes Booth so vulnerable.

    Booth wouldn’t need to distance himself so much from Bones if he had truly moved on and buried his feelings like he keeps telling everyone around him (ironically he and Bones are the only ones who accept that – but that’s only because they want to believe that.)

    I also think that the way Brennan is trying to help him move on is making Booth feel worse. She’s trying to be supportive of him being with someone other than her, who he wanted to be with in the first place, and she’s trying to look unaffected by all of it so he won’t feel bad. But imagine how Booth feels when Bones seems okay with it all. He’s hurt, thinking that he was all alone in his feelings about their relationship, that she doesn’t care about him the way he does about her, and I think he feels a little bitter about it.

  18. Amazing post – how have I not seen it before today!

    After reading and all the comments, wow my heart hurts for Booth and I feel a bit guilty for feeling like he’s not been his usual wonderful self this season – of course he hasn’t!

    Everybody has such great insights, really feeling for Booth now – he’s trying so hard, and I don’t want him to feel like a failure or that he’s destined to be alone. Phew, there are some heavy hearts in the Bones world right now!

  19. I love this question, because it just completely diffuses the blame game. I will never understand how in the BONES community, all of a sudden it’s gone from B&B vs. the world to B vs B. Does it really have to be one or the other that we love most? Can’t we root for B&B as one thing? That’s how I still feel. As far as vulnerability, I just don’t know! I think Booth sort of has the most to lose, I’m afraid.

    If Brennan were to move on, and Hannah were to break up with him, then what? Ick. I love Booth a lot, so of course I’m worried about him. Then again, with Brennan… I keep coming back to My Fair Lady and how Eliza is sort of unable to connect to either world, her past experience, and the hoity toity world she was ‘primed’ for. I don’t see HH leaving Brennan in ‘limbo’, but at the moment, she is incredibly vulnerable as well.

    Of course, they are also both strong as hell, so I love that too 🙂

  20. Ha, funny some people immediately thought Booth. But now we have DiP to provide us with more information, right? I doubt the automatic answer is still Booth! 🙂

  21. Pingback: A Morning After Q Revisited: Who Is More Vulnerable Right Now- Booth or Brennan? « Bones Theory

  22. For me, this is very much a black & white question. Who was more vulnerable? Brennan.

    Booth loved Hannah. Maybe he didn’t love her the way he loved Brennan but he loved Hannah. She made him happy. He was caught up in doing everything he could to make her happy, to build a life with her. He might have been conflicted around Brennan, at times, but in the end he went home to Hannah and he made that relationship work.

    Brennan had no one. And not only did she have no one but she was forced to confront exactly what that meant, emotionally, for the first time in her adult life. Was that her own fault, because of the 100th and Maluku? Yea, okay (sorta/kinda/maybe) but being the cause of the shift in their relationship doesn’t negate the pain she went through having to watch the fall-out.

    I felt sorry for Booth because he was just trying so damn hard to make his life perfect. But Brennan broke my heart because she didn’t even have the wrong pieces to pick up. She had nothing, and she knew it.

    • I agree with everything you said. Neither one of them is perfect, and they both made mistakes, but for more than half of season six, I think Brennan was the one who really paid for hers.

      • Yea….poor pitiful Booth. He was so miserable he had to go home and have a nooner with a beautiful blonde. Oh, the horror.

      • Love the sarcasm, MJ. I did feel really sorry for him after Brennan’s confession, though. He seemed to want to regain some of the closeness they had after that. We never saw if and how his behavior toward Hannah was any different.

      • I really wish we had seen more glimpses into the meat of that relationship. Even something small, like the little window we had of Booth and Tessa eating dinner together but not talking, that would have said so much about his state of mind and what he might have been wrestling with. If we’d been given those little glimpses, I (just me, personally) might feel different about this question of vulnerability.

      • Isn’t it ironic that we wanted more “meat” of the relationship, when most of us feel like we saw enough of Hannah as it was? I’ve heard some people talk about how Booth never really hung out with Brennan when he was with Hannah. Granted, they spent less time with just the two of them out of work, naturally. But think of how many scenes there were with the three of them together vs. just any two of them. And when it was just Booth and Hannah, sometimes it was because Brennan declined the invitation to join. I don’t think Brennan felt betrayed – I think she had enough reasons of her own on why a little distance was in order.

      • Good point – can I get a do-over? Because really, I don’t wish I’d seen *more* of Hannah, but I do wish I’d seen a different point of view, one that let us see into Booth’s brain and any conflict he might have felt between Brennan and Hannah.

        But (sorry for the stream of consciousness rambling) he loved Hannah. Maybe we didn’t see that conflict because there was no conflict. He loved her. He was trying to make it work. End of story.

        I’m so glad the first half of last year is over.

      • MJ, sure, he was getting some from a beautiful woman. But, as C-bones mentioned, after DitP, I think he was thrown for a loop. He definitely wasn’t as vulnerable as Brennan, but I think he probably had to figure Brennan’s confession was some sort of cosmic punishment or something. I mean, he did what he thought she wanted–he continued to work with her after she rejected him personally, then he came back from Afghanistan and resumed their partnership after she (at least from his perspective) rejected their partnership, too. He moved on. He was getting his sh–um, stuff together, and finding balance. Then she drops the bomb. I agree that it would have been nice to see a little more of his internal conflict over that, but even though we didn’t see it, I still think it was there. He makes his (admittedly ill-advised) proposal and gets shot down. He feels worthless and unloved. At least Brennan was able to identify what she did wrong. I think Booth was clueless. He felt like he tried so hard to do the right thing, and he still got screwed. So, yeah, I agree that Brennan certainly was the more vulnerable of the two, but Booth had his share of sadness and vulnerability, too.

      • I definitely agree that there was a difference in him after Doctor in the Photo. I’m not sure that I personally would call that vulnerability but since I’m in a better mood now, I’m willing to entertain the thought. 🙂

        He was definitely different, though. And I agree that we could draw a straight line from her confession to his proposal.

      • MJ, I get that. I’m less inclined to be charitable towards Booth when I see episodes that include him making out with Hannah. But I just read a story on ff.net this afternoon that focuses on his better qualities, so I’m feeling generous.

      • Both were vulnerable but Booth was more in the beginning of season 6. Brennan had to step back and keep everything on a professional level. Booth was the one that had to deal with 2 women in his life. Can you imagine him trying not to say the wrong thing to the wrong person? Brennan was also passing conflicting messages across. She talks about thinking of them together but then she concluded it would not work. Also that she have felt love but cannot live her life like that. Booth is trying to process all this information and that puts him in a difficult place. He just concentrated on the concrete evidence of love he had which is with Hannah and pushed the unsure one behind him.
        Fundamentally Booth did not change but he stepped carefully around Hannah. He can be himself with Brennan because he trusts her 100% and she hasn’t done anything to make him doubt it but still weary when it comes to discussions about Hannah. I am sure things were hairy when Brennan and Hannah became friends. He must have felt like ‘fate’ was really against him. He hid it all well though.

        When Booth told Hannah about Brennan’s confession in FF, Hannah tugged at his arm but he did not even move it and sort of remained closed off ( this is all about body language). With him being so touchy feely with Hannah, I would have expected him to drape his arm across her chair or her shoulders when he was reassuring her – but maybe it is just me.

        MJ – love your sarcasm. It could just be a way of getting rid of the tension he must have been feeling. When he went back to the crime scene with Brennan and the ranger after the nooner, did anyone notice the physical distance between him and Brennan when they were down below the panoramic view? I laughed when I saw that.

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