Bones Theory

Open Letter To Myself: December 4th, 2010


Dear Seels,

This is an intervention.

You need to stop making offhanded statements about things you know are important. Did you learn nothing from your open letter to Hart Hanson after The Couple in the Cave? You explained very clearly that you were ashamed at the blasé way you’d tossed out edicts on what needed to happen with Brennan’s character development.

After the season five finale, I tweeted that I loved it for the following reasons:

  1. “Because…even though the work they do is important, it’s not important enough to be their whole lives, and they will learn that.”
  2. “Because…even though they are moving to different parts of the globe, they are still on the same path.”
  3. “Because…in order for Brennan to realize she is in love with Booth, her first love, anthropology, must not be enough for her.”

And I added that the theme of Brennan’s character development is “what she thought she knew, she must examine” and “the show is called ‘Bones’ and HH has been slowly chipping away at Brennan’s walls, and I think this is just another step in that process until ‘single life shared’”

Now, my cheeks burn with shame at how blasé I was about it all; as if with the flick of a wrist and a few combinations of 140 characters, it was so easy to explain.


So now…why are you doing that thing again? Stop doing that. The other day you tweeted this, “We know that every storyline revolves around Brennan. So maybe, instead of hoping that Booth will ‘get a clue’ or whatever, we can hope that Brennan gets a clue soon. That’s the only way this gets resolved. Obviously, the writers feel Brennan is not ‘there’ yet, and until she is, this is what is happening. History speaks.”

Why toss things out there so casually? Why can’t you seem to realize that what you’re saying is not so easy to come by? Stop feeling like you have to have all the answers; stop acting like you know what’s best. That’s just pride and it’s not attractive on you.

Perhaps what you say is true, but is it really your truth to declare? And if the result of that truth is the eventual pain and heartache to the characters on BONES…is it worth being right? The pain in your own heart suggests it’s a tough question.

Why not just relax and see what happens? Put your pride aside and just relax. And please, please stop using the characters’ pain and suffering for your own gain, for your own popularity, for your own need to be right, and for your need to be right before anyone else is. Sure, that’s not always your motivation, but if you look closely, you’ll see that it’s part of it.

Based on your own experience you know that the path to redemption is not easy. It means stopping where you are and making a U-turn of 180 degrees. But you can’t just jump up and over obstacles like in a Super Mario Bros game; you have to walk back through the same path, overcoming everything in your way until you are to the place you need to be. It’s not easy…you’ve been there, and you could show a little kindness toward characters who are in the same position.

BONES is a story of redemption;  it’s what you love most about it. Do you want people making judgment calls on your path to redemption? No, you don’t. Take a lesson and stop doing that to others. If you can’t stop, then you need to stop all of this altogether. If you must say something, ask yourself this question…do you believe in redemption?

And as Booth answered in The He in the She, from personal experience and confidence in his path, you can say, “Yes, I do”.  Then just leave it at that.

Peace, Love & Bones



11 thoughts on “Open Letter To Myself: December 4th, 2010

  1. I have very similar talks with myself all the time – once again you’ve proven we’re not alone in our insanity. I really do think it’s all gonna be ok and this turmoil and pain will be worth it. It’s gotta be, right?

    And thanks for mentioning ‘redemption’. It’s the theme I first identified with in the show and the one that keeps me coming back because I do believe in redemption.

  2. I question your need to enact a ‘self-intervention’

    BT would lose a very valuable perspective if you take away the essence of what makes this blog so special. When the going gets tough with the SL, when you know that hard times are ahead for these characters, it is a natural response to point out the problems and the root causes. By putting those thoughts out there you are generating an honest and open discourse, not attempting to sway or influence others to your way of thinking. Just because the tone of BONES is dark and negative right now doesn’t require you to be more or less optimistic than anyone else in the fandom. Your blogs are not inflammatory or disrespectful – but if you happen to put things out there that represent your honest reaction at the time – so be it. If you look back with the aid of a retrospectoscope and feel that you have changed your mind…it is simply because you have worked through the issues since that time. You called it the way you saw it at the time. Objectively, your opinions are just that…they may or may not align with truths that are known, or truths that are yet to be revealed. What you said at the time still holds validity, it is how you truly felt at the time, it represents the exploratory steps on the journey to seek understanding. Are these not the things that we do on the path of redemption?

    I put it to you that perhaps you should ask if you believe in the process of redemption, not the outcome of redemption. The process involves exploration, discourse and judgement: against standards, beliefs, truths and actions. Being honest with ourselves and being willing to explore issues honestly does not equate to hubris.

    Wishing you peace, love and Bones…

  3. i’m with Skole, though my words have fewer syllables: stop being so hard on yourself, you’re only human.

    • Hahaha! Now why couldn’t I be as succinct as you, Erin?

      • lol, usually i’m where you are: “why use five words when you can use fifty?”, but i’m on a deadline today.

    • That’s so true,erin! 🙂 We all just need to hang in there. It’s was going to be a bumpy ride only we might have forgotten to ‘put our seat belts on’ in time(not realizing just HOW bumpy a ride it would be). Hope that made some sense! 🙂 I can go on but my head is STILL reeling from the promo.:)

  4. Analysis is all about making edicts, assumptions, and proclamations. And then you support it.

    Blogs are all about finding a way to voice your views, your opinions – being heard.

    You have been successful at blending these together! I don’t think there is any relaxing possible this season – so keep your dander ruffled and keep calling it like you see it. 🙂

  5. I understand your point, but I also agree with Skole that’s it’s okay to just put your thoughts out there as you understand them at the time, because it’s okay to change your mind in retrospect, especially with new information. How else would we have this wonderful blog where we can agree and disagree with each other? There are a lot of things we don’t know for certain – it’s pretty much conjecture and sometimes I think TPTB do that on purpose, anyways. When we discuss B&B, we are discussing characters who almost never talk about their feelings way down deep. What helps me sometimes is to think about how something would happen in real life. Sure, B&B are an “epic” couple, but they are still human and are prone to miscommunication, insecurities, and fears. And I think the point of the show is Brennan’s development, no matter what her relationship with Booth is. I believe (and I can speak from personal experience) that character growth is not a linear path at all. Sometimes you go forward a little, maybe by leaps and bounds. Sometimes you regress some or a lot. Maybe you grow in some areas and go back in others. Maybe some things happen that put you right back at your starting point. Basically, its full of winds and turns, simple because people are complicated. Emily Deschanel has mentioned several times that one of the things she likes about her character are some of her contradictions, because she feels that’s very real in life. I agree, and I guess that’s why I try not to overanalyze too much about whether something is in character or not or if what she says and what she does is consistent. I have yet to reach that consistency myself and see most other people struggle with that. And David Boreanaz is always talking about the show being about these two people on a “journey”, so IMO that says that the show is focused on that, not their (inevitable **fingers crossed**) getting together.

    But back to your point, :), we just have to let these characters be who they are. When I see Brennan growing in her development, even apart from her usual closeness with Booth, I’m really happy for her. It’s harder not to judge Booth right now. I don’t know why it’s so easy to feel so sorry for Brennan and be so mad at Booth when she’s the one who turned him down without any future hope. To watch them go through this phase is painful but necessary, and I cannot wait until it’s over. I like what you said about showing kindness to the characters – I call it empathizing.

  6. Great job with this post.

  7. Sarah, don’t berate yourself. You really helped me with your reminder that it is a Brennan-centric show.
    Though, you may be right, maybe we all talk and analyze too much and enjoy too little. But… somehow Bones is different from other shows. I love Castle, Fringe or House for the suspense, fun and distraction. But they cannot influence me in the way Bones can, they cannot make me feel so much. They cannot make me a puddle of heart and fever because of 30 seconds and tears in a car…

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